To Love The Young And The Pure
by TheStrangeAndBeautiful
Summary: .."He was old and ruined and she was young and pure. He knew how much he meant to her and it scared him to death." "I love you too House." House / Cameron. Romance / Angst. Damien Rice Lyrics.


* * *

_**And What I am to you is not real  
What I am to you, you do not need  
What I am to you is not what you mean to me  
You give me miles and miles of mountains  
And I'll ask for the sea**_

'What?' House groaned into his phone.

'House.' He recognised Cameron's voice.

'I'm sleeping.'

'I'm outside.'

'Outside where?' House sat up awkwardly, frowning

'Outside your place.'

House pulled his door open and sure enough, there she was, sitting in the dark, on his door step, arms wrapped around her slight frame, attempting but failing to protect herself from the cold. She shivered slightly.

He'd kept her waiting. He'd used the bathroom and brushed his teeth. He pulled on some jeans and a shirt. He'd hoped she'd be gone.

'Why are you here?' He asked bluntly. She stood up slowly, turning to face him.

'House, I…' Her breath hit him and he cut her off.

'You're drunk.' She avoided his gaze, knowing it would be critical and hard.

'Can I come in?' She swayed slightly and gritted her teeth. He couldn't help a small, amused smile. He looked behind her and his gaze swept the road.

'How did you get here?' She opened her mouth to answer but then stopped, a frown tugging at her eyebrows.

'I…don't know.' She shrugged, holding onto the door frame for support. He raised his eyebrows.

'You're drunker than I thought.' He stood back, rolling his eyes. 'We can't have you running riot in the streets.' She walked passed him and he closed his door.

He limped into his living area, a slower process without his cane. She was sitting on his couch, rubbing her forehead.

'Can I have some Vicodin?' She asked.

'Nope. Mine.' He shook his head. 'Besides,' He felt the need to add, when she looked up at him. 'Alcohol and pills aren't a good idea.'

'Right. Like you don't mix them all the time.' She slurred.

'That's me.' He said simply.

'And it's different because…'

'Because last time I checked I didn't have long curly brown hair and…'

'Seriously, House.' She cut in, wisely, before he could list all the other physical differences between them. 'It's a couple of pills! If it's ok for you, why not me?' He pursed his lips for a moment before answering.

'Because it wouldn't matter if something happened to me.'

'But it would to me?'

'I'm sure it would _to you_.' He threw back.

'But not to you?' She asked, eyes clear with honesty. He sighed.

'O.k.' He snapped. 'Have the damn pills.' He took out the bottle and threw it at her. She fumbled with the cap but couldn't take it off. He watched, interested. 'Rules apply; if you can't open, you can't have.'

She sighed and gave up, dropping the bottle on the table. His eyes narrowed as he studied her. Hunched over slightly, pale face, dark eyes and the trail of a tear exposed by the line of mascara down the side of her face.

'Trust you to be a depressed drunk.' He grabbed his pills back.

She didn't bother arguing. She was drunk – very and she was depressed – a little. She shrugged and stood up.

'Why are you here?' He asked again, watching as she walked around the table towards him.

'I don't know.' She shrugged.

'You can sleep it off.' He nodded towards the couch.

She ignored him.

'Fine have the bed… I prefer the couch anyway.'

'I'm not tired.'

He sighed and rolled his eyes again.

'I…' She started but swayed dramatically. House reached out and steadied her, their eyes meeting as she clung onto his arm. 'I love you House.' She said suddenly. He let go of her and looked away, sad and disappointed.

_**Don't throw yourself like that  
In front of me**_

'No you don't.' He told her forcefully.

'I do.' She stepped closer and again he could smell the alcohol, giving him his next reply.

'You're drunk.' He stepped back.

'Which means I'm being honest.'

'Great.' He said sarcastically now looking around sheepishly as she pawed at him.

'Cameron…' He started but one look at her and he stopped. She looked up at him, face pure, lips pouted, eyes wide. How could they be full of so much hurt and yet so much hope?

A moment later and he kissed her.

_**I kissed your mouth, your eyes  
Is that all you need?**_

He moved back, shocked at what he'd done but she was pulling him back towards her, eyes searching him.

_**Don't drag my love around**_

He could taste the alcohol and her sweetness.

Volcanoes melt me down

After he had finally pushed her away, she slept and it was his turn to drink. He was ashamed and angry. She was drunk. If she regretted it later, he'd taken advantage- sort of – more than he'd like to have done. And if she didn't – well, then he'd given her false hope.

'But is it false hope?' Wilson asked. 'You kissed back.'

'It was just a kiss.' House growled into the phone.

'Well then it doesn't matter if you _sort of_ took advantage of her. Either way you have nothing to worry about.'

But he did worry. As he handed her coffee and watched her slip into his bathroom. As he drove her to her place so she could take her car to work. As he studied her at work.

As he drove to hers that night.

He was old and ruined and she was young and pure. He knew how much he meant to her and it scared him to death. She held so much importance over him and yet it was over whoshe _thought he could be _not who_ he was. _

_**What I am to you is not real  
What I am to you, you do not need**_

He loved her. She was in love with the wrong him. He wanted to make her happy but he knew he couldn't. She thought he could.

_**What I am to you is not what you mean to me**_

He was trapped in-between reality and its cold reflection. Maybe he could go through life pretending he wasn't tainting her purity and maybe she could go through life believing he was someone different. But he knew who he was. And he was awkward, hard, sarcastic, demanding, selfish…

You give me miles and miles of mountains  
And I'll ask for the sea.

'I'd hurt you.' He said, watching her, pained, as she watched him, trusting.

'No you wouldn't.' She smiled kindly and his heart broke that little bit more.

'I can't _not_ do this.' He said. 'But I shouldn't' do this.'

'Not do what?' She frowned slightly. But she knew. He sank into her couch and put his head in his hands. She knelt in front of him.

'Stop it.' He sighed, looking up at her through tired wet eyes as she put her hands on his knees and her eyes pleaded with his.

_**Don't hold yourself like that  
cause You'll hurt your knees  
**_

'No.' She leant forwards. 'I want to be happy.' She let her lips graze his. 'I want you to be happy.' He let her kiss him and before he could stop he was kissing her back, hard and aggressive. His roughness scratching her smoothness. She drank him in and he hated them both for it. She stopped and gasped for breath. She stood up and then sat beside him. He let his hand meet her face and slowly brushed away the strands of hair. He lowered his hand, bringing her hair away from her face, sweeping it to rest on her other shoulder. He kissed her lips. He closed his eyes and kissed her neck. He kissed her shoulder, leaning back slightly, gently turning her. He kissed the top of her spine. She shivered and turned back and smiled, encouraging him to appreciate her. She was fragile and young and he stopped.

_**Well I kissed your mouth, and back  
But that's all I need**_

She was confused and sad for a moment but the smile returned. And that was how it would continue. He knew that. Did she? If she didn't, he ached at the thought of what he would turn her into … and if he didn't change her, well, then he would continue to hurt her again and again and that would break both of their hearts. And if she did know, well, then her heart was already broken and his wasn't far behind.

_**  
Don't build your world around  
Volcanoes melt you down**_

But he loved her and he couldn't rip her apart right then and there. And so, he thought darkly, their love was already broken. Not much of a start, he thought bitterly. 'You make me happy,' he said gruffly.

_**But like a new disease, she's still too young to treat**_

'I love you too House.'

_****_

Volcanoes melt you down  
She's still too young

_**What I am to you  
**__**You do not need  
**__**Is not real  
I kissed your mouth  
You do not need me**_

Lyrics: Damien Rice, Volcano


End file.
